Sunday, April 17, 2011

Naked burglar

We sent four hogs to market via Sylvana meats Saturday Morning, and had gotten to the farm early to do so.  Day started at 6:30 or so, and the hogs were killed and on the truck by 9.  We did the other chores, ran some errands and by 3pm we were done, so headed home. 

I've been having trouble with my pickup truck, and it was in the shop.  That figures into this story because I'd usually be carrying a rifle, shotgun and pistol with me.  The rifle we use for slaughtering hogs; the shotgun for pests, and the pistol in the even that we need to put an animal down or need to deal with some sort of emergency.  We'd taken them all out of the truck and put them into the gun safe in the house; the farm kill guy uses his own gun. 

On arrival to the house about 3:30 or 4pm I was sitting in the car replying to an email on my iphone and adrea unlocked the back door, and came back immediately:  There's someone in there!

We'd been having some work done, and I wasn't sure if it was one of the workmen, perhaps returning for something, or even if there was anyone there.  Normally, if i'm going to clear a house, a pistol or shotgun is my choice...  none available. 

I walked in and heard water running, somewhere upstairs.  I yelled "come on out!" and no response, and I walked up the stairs to the second floor, where i could hear the shower running in the upstairs bathroom.  A computer of mine was on the floor of the hall, and the room looked like it had been ransacked. 

I opened the door to the bathroom and there was a skinny white guy IN MY SHOWER. 

Who are YOU!  "dude, it's cool, it's fine..." 
No, it is NOT fine.  Get out of my house! 
So I looked down and all of his clothes were on the floor by the shower.  Shoes, shirt, coat,  pants.  I picked up all of his close and went down the stairs, out the back door and tossed all of his clothes over the fence into the neighbors yard; it's a 30' drop off  retaining wall.  Screw you, burglar!

I called 911, and while i was on the phone with the police dispatcher the naked guy came to the back door and said "give me back my clothes".  I said "just wait, I'm sure the police will take care of it for you" and he went back into my house. 

30 seconds later ANOTHER GUY comes out of my house; dressed in a grey top, black slacks and black and white tennis shoes, he's mid-20s, white, skinny, with short dark hair.  I tell him to stop that the police are on the way, and he doesn't say a word, just starts walking away. 

I'm not about to let this guy get away; i'm not sure what they've taken or what damage they did getting in, but I follow the guy, on the phone with 911 dispatch the whole way.  "We're walking south on boyleston, he's running now..."  I chased him 12 blocks, and the police nabbed him at the corner of boren and pike.  Positive ID and he's in custody.  Excellent.  Thank you, Seattle Police. 

So I get a ride back to the house from one of the officers, they take pictures, and then I find out that andrea chased the naked guy down the street.  For reasons that are not clear to me, he chose to steal a pair of my snowboard boots when he left.  So he's running down the street barefoot in a towel carrying a pair of snowboard boots and his coat when apprehended, 200' from my front door. 

When they retrieved the naked guys clothes, they found a knife and flashlight; the knife made me glad I'd de-pantsed the guy right off the bat.  Plus no one feels tough when they're naked. 

Gun safe was fine; they'd taken a sheet off the bed and filled it with dvds and small electronics, and then one of them decided to take a shower.  Just plain weird.

The police officers were laughing at the whole situation; "you handled it exactly right; called us, kept the guy in sight; taking the clothes was GENIUS!  made him super easy to identify.  'naked and dripping wet'"

"these guys who burglarize, it's not like they do it once.  We love to catch them.  ".  Thanks again Seattle Police. 

This could have turned out differently. If it'd had my truck, and felt that my or andreas life was in danger during this episode, one or both of these guys could have ended up dead.  Broad daylight, saturday afternoon.  Pretty damned brazen. 

Guess I'm going to call an alarm company on monday.  The joys of living downtown. 

10 comments:

wobbly.com said...

Good work there. Why on earth would the dude take a shower? Maybe you have some nice bathroom renovation he wanted to try out.

It took me a while to figure out your home was in downtown Seattle. I was wondering how on earth you ended up at Pike and Boren before I figured it out!

Nancy Olympia WA said...

The dudes must have thought you both were gone because the truck was gone in addition to the rig you were driving.

Good thing Andrea wasn't going home alone and you were with her.

I've been broken into before. At the time I owned a rottweiler that was in the house. Intruder broke bedroom window to get in but didn't go any further then that. Assuming Abbie must have put up quite a fuss on the other side of the bedroom door. It was creepy not nowing who it was.

Craig said...

Maybe the guy liked your Kohler bathroom fixtures.

Anonymous said...

This is one of the reasona less guns, not more are the answer. If they and you both had been armed "one or both of these guys could have ended up dead".

Instead you had to use brains and phone. Killing a person is not like slaughtering a pig. An altogether better ending don't you agree?

Anonymous said...

Anon - get a grip... Those guys will be back on the street in no time. Ready to rob, steel, and some day probabably kill, if that haven't already. Bruce having a gun and protecting his home and family would have been totally legit and saved another family the grief of being violated or worse. No, they are not pigs. They are worse...
You also missed the fact that the guys were armed. One had a knife. He just happened to have left it in his clothes. Bruce and Andrea got lucky is all. Few guns in the hands of law abiding citizens just means the criminals have less to worry about and know you are a sitting duck. Try this... Post a sign on your door saying "Gun Free Zone", letting everyone know that you are anti-gun and have no gun to protect your home and family. Go ahead - and sleep well at night ;)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PoeoGkneIqs&feature=player_embedded

-Chad

Matt said...

Glad you are okay and the bad guys are in jail. Sadly, they will be out within a few days. Many people don't realize how unsafe you feel in your home after being burglarized. I have an alarm and it brings me peace of mind that there is nobody in my home when I get there. If it goes off when I'm home, the first thing I do is get my gun. Criminals have no rights in my home. They make choices when they decide to break into a home and they will have to live (or die) with the choices they make. Why people in Seattle are so set on defending criminals is beyond me.

Mike said...

That's pretty scary. Glad you guys are alright.

Jason W. said...

Two words: Concealed carry.

dinkleberries said...

Well said, Chad and Matt!!
the first anon is an idiot!

robin said...

WOW, that is one crazy story. Glad the police caught them and you both were okay.

There has been a rash of burglaries on our street. Every time we come home lately I feel nervous. Probably helps that our dogs sound like they will eat you if they hear a noise.