From time to time I feed bread to my pigs (Thanks Patrick!). Sometimes its packaged, sometimes its just the loaves. Today it was packaged in all of its retail glory.
Each package extols the virtue of that particular loaf, and talks about the health benefits of this bread. I am a health god today, throwing loaves of great health to my pigs. In fact, according to the packages, they'll get virtually every health benefit known to man!This loaf is even named HEALTH NUT -- you can't get any better than that. I'll have to read the package closer to see exactly the sorts of good it does me, but it makes me feel good just to handle this plastic bag and have it affirm that I'm feeding my pigs the best stuff on earth!
Hearty grains! that just sounds good! It must be amazing stuff. [slash open bag, shake out bread, toss bag into garbage can]
Yummy. I like honey wheat! [slash open bag, shake out bread, throw bag into garbage can... repeat 200x]
These pigs are so astonished by the health benefits of this bagel that they're rooted in place! Each of them wants to give the others the healthy benefit of this particular morsel. Or they're so full of bread that they can't eat any more. I can't decide.
They prefer the sugar glazed donuts? Your pigs are just not THAT into being healthy!
ReplyDeleteHeh. Those are some healthy pigs. Full of marketing awesomeness.
ReplyDeleteah, orowheat - my favorite bread of all, despite living in germany with bakery fresh bread every day. we just spent the holidays in seattle with my family and ate orowheat every day mmmmm lucky pigs! (on a side note the orowheat stays "fresh" way longer than german bread which you must eat within 2 or 3 days of purchase.)
ReplyDeleteI wonder why that is? I know that the bread that I've been feeding is perfect. No mold, no damp -- perfectly good bread.
ReplyDeleteThey're packaged in 2 layers of plastic, which is a bit of a problem. I usually use a knife to slash open both bags. Just takes too long to unwrap it like you'd do at home.
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